منتديات الـــود - - [ Short Funny Jokes ] -

السلآم عليكم و رحمة الله و بركآته

Hi

? How r u every body

Hope u fine good day

well

It's been a long time I've never post such a thread in my favourite department

So that , I brought these funny jokes that I really liked it so much

I hope all of you having fun with them

Let's StarT

[ 1 ]

http://www.stevecrocker.co.uk/images/ventriloquist.jpg

A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small club in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he's going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts shouting: ''I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person, because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against, not only blondes, but women in general...and all in the name of humor!''

The ventriloquist is embarrassed and begins to apologize, when the blonde yells, ''You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little jerk on your knee!''

what a poor ventriloquist

:biggrin:

[ 2 ]

http://www.ct.gov/dep/lib/dep/wildli...eets/bats1.gif

Once there were three bats. They lived in a cave surrounded by three castles. One night the bats made a bet to see who could drink the most blood.

The first bat comes home one night and has blood dripping off his fangs. The other two bats are amazed and asked how much blood he had drunk.

The first bat said, "See that castle over there? I drank the blood of three people." The second bat goes out on his night and comes back with blood around his mouth. The other two bats are astonished and ask how many people's blood had he drunk. The bat said, "See that castle over there. I drank the blood of five people."

The third bat goes out on his night and comes back covered in blood. This was totally amazing to the other two bats. They ask how much blood he drank. The 3rd bat said, "See that castle over there?" and the other bats nod. "Well," says the third bat, "I didn't."

Squint bat :a070:

I'd like to mention that in the reality , bats don't see anything
they just recognize their directions by Ultra sound

^

^

^

scientificly proved

[ 3 ]

http://www.cartoonstock.com/lowres/lka0052l.jpg

Murphy lay in hospital covered in bandages head to foot - with just two little slits for his eyes. ‘What happened to you?’ asked Cassidy. ‘I staggered out of the pub and a lorry hit me a glancing blow and knocked me through a plate glass window.’ ‘Begod,’ said Cassidy. ‘It’s a good job you were wearing those bandages or you’d have been cut to ribbons!’

! dumP :a070:

[ 4 ]

http://www.moveed.com/data/media/89/5.JPG

وش الدنيآ بدون بعآرينَآ الحلوين ؟ :biggrin:

The little camel went to his mother and asked, "Mother, why do we camels have such big eyes?"
She looked on him lovingly and replied, "You see, my son, when we are walking in the dessert and the wind starts to blowing and there's sand everywhere, we need these big eyes to keep an eye on one another so that we don't get lost."

"Oh!" he said. "And why do we have such huge feet?

"Well," she said, "they allow us to walk easily in the dessert sands and help us avoid sinking into the dunes."

"Wow," he said, "great equipment. What the heck is this stuff on our backs for?"

"You see," his mother informed, "we can walk for days, even weeks without food or water, so we use it to store fat during those times. But why do you ask me all these obvious questions?"

"Well, mother," said the young camel, "I was just wondering, if we've got all of this great stuff, what are we doing in the zoo?"

[ 5 ]

http://www.virginmedia.com/images/br...in-280x400.jpg

A blonde and Justin Timberlake were walking along the beach. Suddenly, Justin says, “Aww, Britney, look at the dead birdie.”

The blonde looks up at the sky and says, “Where?!”

I really now got that ... when you r being famous .... you loose part of ur mind :a070:

? Don't you think

well .... I'm stoping here

hope you enjoy my thread

See U